Reaquaintance

Feels strangely odd when you're suddenly aware of the existance of cousins, cousins you haven't heard from in years, over a decade in my case, and first cousins at that. Little tykes when we were first met and yet we never did maintain that contact for what reason I never did knew. Lost touch, no news or whatsoever and suddenly a reappearance thanks to the parents trying their luck to bump into dad at the Zoo which they eventually did a couple of days back. Not too keen on a reaquaintance as of yet as anti-social as I may sound.. feels rather awkward to be thrown into a situation as such and knowing one's a model brings lesser self assurance. Well everyone's alittle judgemental every now and then, not that I'm not proud of a family member doing well but the years apart havent made it easier. While some may be accepting others may put it as riding on their fame to success. As horrid as I may sound its pretty much a general opinion nothing for nor against. Would love to rekindle that lost relationship but knowing me it would probably take some time. Will just leave it to the drama queen little sis of mine to accomplish it, she is afterall way capable of such a task.

The little darling Ryan on the otherhand's doing great in Aussie. Moving was a good choice, being there allowance him to further expand on his capabilities. Got a note from his dad on him being nominated for some prestigious award which will be featured on chann 7 in western australia.

Am reflecting on myself. I think I messed up a tad during the childhood years, not too late to change that yet I'm feeling down. Have never been one who's too accepting of failures of any sort yet I still have no clue as where or what to venture forward for/to.

Becks what the fuck are you doing with your life?!